I always say the ParmFarm is about growing because it kind of makes sense. You know, farm-grow. Get it? But ‘grow’ is kind of a vague term. In terms of a farm, you could grow flowers or food. And, you’d have to make adjustments, depending on the weather and the change of seasons. Growing personally – or professionally – also requires flexibility and a willingness to change.

Are you good at change? Or are you stuck?

I have been stuck many times in my life. Just standing in one place. My feet weren’t glued to the ground or anything but I couldn’t really figure out where I was supposed to go next, so I just stood there. Waiting.

That’s what I do when I’m not sure about something. I wait. It’s a little trick my guru (okay, therapist) taught me and I wanted to share it with you because it ALWAYS works. You won’t say something you’ll regret, you won’t make a change you’ll wish you hadn’t. You’ll make a change for the better, when it’s right.

WHEN YOU ARE NOT SURE WHAT TO DO ABOUT SOMETHING, WAIT. 5 MINUTES, 5 HOURS OR 5 DAYS.

Waiting is different than not doing anything. They look the same but they’re different. Just like waiting for a train is different than sleeping on a bench at the station.

If you wait for the right train then chances are it will take you where you want to go. Perhaps you’ll chat with someone or read an article that will help you decide which train to take. But if you are asleep on the bench, you’ll miss the train. Or, if you act on impulse, you may get on a train headed in the wrong direction. Being stuck is uncomfortable but being lost is worse.

I felt stuck before I met the Sheriff and before I started the ParmFarm, but I wasn’t lost. I knew I needed to make a change but I didn’t know what I wanted that change to be, so I just waited. And then, my train came in.

This was my thinking while I was waiting:

Usually, when you are stuck, you’ve got two options. Decide how you’d like to change, or it will be decided for you. Other people will have more say in your life than you do.

Just like Mother Nature has the last say on a farm, the most significant changes in life are often beyond our control. But, I’ll bet the best farmers don’t just sit around fearing foul weather, they plan according to their experiences and according to the forecast.

If your life is going to change, and it will, wouldn’t you like to have some say?

One of the reasons I started the ParmFarm was it would allow me to have some say. Not ‘say’ as in a running commentary, but ‘say’ as in some influence over where my life is headed.

I have two paying jobs for which I am perpetually (yes, that’s the word I mean) grateful. I am a reporter for NBC Connecticut and I work for KYW Newsradio in Philadelphia, via the web. I’ve had both jobs for years now but, as we’ve all heard, ‘media is changing’.

So, in anticipation of how that change may affect me, I wanted to embrace it, rather than deny it.

Embracing change is one of my strengths, which I know because a friend told me. Good friends are like mirrors in that sometimes they can reflect back to you things you can’t see yourself.

Me: ‘Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s really good at embracing change?’
My friends: ‘Oh, you are Amy! You are the best!’.

But, as anyone who has a mirror knows, not all reflections are flattering.

Me: ‘Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the best cook?’
My friends: ‘Oh, not you Amy! You are not a good cook at all. Let’s go out to eat!’.

So, recently, while I was out to eat with a friend, she commented that one of my strengths is my ability to make a change to better my life or when things aren’t working out the way I had hoped. She said this in comparison to seeing herself as someone who just kind of ‘lets life happen’ to her, and then reacts or responds accordingly.

Your life is going to change. Do you want to have some say?

If you don’t know what to do, wait. 5 minutes, 5 hours, or 5 days.

Don’t get on the wrong train just because that’s where the crowd is headed. Don’t get on the wrong train just to get out of the station. As long as you’re not asleep on the bench, your train will come in.

Or, maybe you’ll decide to walk or take the bus instead.


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